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You Sure That Will Fit?

August 6, 2009

I have a friend on twitter who was nice enough to send me a lovely present at Christmas time. There’s a long story behind this gift, but you have to admit it’s an interesting gift. I suppose you could classify it as a novelty, and I wasn’t sure it would even fit, but I was excited to try.

Monster Cock

Monster Cock

As you can see, not only is it really long – but it’s girth is – well – gigantic. Thank goodness it came with a bottle of lube. This big-ass toy actually measures 7 inches around (what??). Well no wonder it’s hard to get in.

But I did indeed work at it until I could get it in. How far do you say? I have no idea. Kind of hard to measure. I thought of drawing a line but I am NOT a contortionist. If I were rating it (sorry friend) I would have given it like 2 1/2 stars out of 5, because playing with it solo isn’t much fun. I mean once it’s in, well it’s IN. But I’m really a clitoral stimulation girl anyway. So, I left it in and went ahead and rubbed one out as they say. Okay before the orgasm, it was meh – okay. I do like feeling a cock inside me so that was nice, but when I orgasmed, and everything tightened up? Then it was fun! Must hit just the right spot to send the normal orgasm up a couple of notches. And I do a bit of gushing once I pull the dildo out. I know I don’t use THAT much lube.

That is not the end of the tale though! It would have stayed at 2.5 stars, and only come out once in a while when I feel the need to be stuffed while playing, which I usually don’t. But I was chatting with a friend on the phone and it seemed the right time to bring it out. I was hoping that maybe things would move into the listen-to-each-other-get-off arena, so I decided to be prepared. With monster inserted, I waited for the phone call, and I discovered something! Positioned just right, I could feel it hit bottom, and if I left it in, I could circle my hips and Oh My! I teased myself with while we texted and then he called. (Bet you didn’t know that did you my phone friend!)

I am not sure if he noticed my heavy breathing and little gasps until I made the comment that I hoped he didn’t mind me playing, but all that rocking had gotten me so hot I HAD to start using my fingers on my clit. The combination took me through several (I stopped counting after 5) orgasms. That pushed this toy up from a 2.5 to a solid 4. (The friend who sent the gift was very happy to hear how much I enjoyed it). I will definitely be experimenting with it again.

Why didn’t it get a 5? Because it’s a bit floppy for solo play. Sitting on it didn’t work well, which would have been fun. And I didn’t get the joy of the balls rubbing against me, because really – 12 inches and 7 inches around? It’s not going to fit that deep. Or maybe I’m just an odd one with a short canal. I have no clue. But there you go – HNT/toy review/damn I had fun getting off. Thank you phone friend for the inspiration and thank you my twitter Santa for the gift!

6 Comments leave one →
  1. August 6, 2009 8:44 pm

    well,” its not the size of the ship, its the motion of the ocean”

  2. August 7, 2009 8:23 am

    nice, very nice

    now that santa’s entered the twitter age, he’s a bonafide freak!

  3. Foole_of_hearts permalink
    August 7, 2009 12:34 pm

    I noticed the heavy breathing! I was enjoying listening!

    • sweetspice permalink*
      August 7, 2009 12:47 pm

      *purr* thank you again!

  4. August 8, 2009 5:40 pm

    Wow, that one is a monster! I’ve taken something nearly as big (girth-wise) and while I enjoy it, it’s a once-in-a-while thing. Thanks for sharing, darlin’. 🙂

  5. August 26, 2009 11:13 am

    Wow. 🙂

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